Nothing Else Will Do, I've Gotta Have You...

The Weepies - Gotta Have You


I take back anything I have said previously. THIS is the most adorable song of all time. I always thought it was cute, but then watching the music video, I see that it's the cutest ever. As is the video.


Also, last night, I was the most bomb kangaroo in history. No big deal. Two of my neighbors randomly showed up right before I was going to get dressed to go out, and they decided that, as they were female, they would be better at helping me with my costume than my roommates. After putting it on, they noted various things about my costume that they thought needed to be remedied: "your ears are too small," or "you should have a joey sticking out of your pouch," or "your tail makes you look like you're taking a giant shit."

I can't deny that last one, though it was easily remedied via a bent clothes hanger. But nevertheless, they decided they needed to help me with my costume.

So we spent the next hour making it even better. By the end of the night, I had kangaroo gloves, there were joey head and paws sticking out of my pouch, my ears were longer and more kangaroo-like, and my shoes were gone, replaced with a few strips of brown tape around the arches of my feet. This last one, as much as I was very strongly for it at the time ("KANGAROOS DON'T WEAR SHOES!!), I decided I no longer liked, as by the time I had gotten to a party, my toes were incredibly cold.

But on the whole, the night was a success. I had FIVE separate people come up to me and tell me that I should be a male model. And it's not like they just heard other people say it, as I had people say it at three separate parties. I don't know why, but apparently very intoxicated people find me terribly attractive. If only everyone was wasted all the time...

Ageless Beauty, Cruelty Makes Its Holes...

Stars - Ageless Beauty


So now, at 2:22, I've almost finished my Halloween costume. I have no choice but to do it now. I'll be busy all day tomorrow, and I need it tomorrow night. Damn.

But it's so baller. So I'm a kangaroo.

I hit up Salvation Army and bought a brown cordury shirt and pants, along with a brown t-shirt. I then hit up Meijer where I acquired another brown t-shirt (on clearance for $1) and a set of black cat ears, as well as 40 super heavy duty safety pins.

So I'm going to wear the cordury shirt and pants. I took the second t-shirt, and through skillful cutting and pinning, fashioned it into a tail which I stuffed with the inside of an old pillow. Also, for future reference, there is no more satisfying activity in the world than stabbing the shit out of a pillow. For real.

I then attached the tail to my pants via the heavy-duty safety pins. I then cut apart the first brown t-shirt and attached it to another emptied out pillow, which will be attached to my shirt and used as my pouch (my plan is to ask incredibly inebriated girls if they'd like to climb in. I'll then proceed to take them home with me).

I then used brown Kineseotex tape and taped up my black cat ears, making them brown kangaroo ears.

Overall, I'm the sexiest kangaroo in history. Now, my madre made ObnoxiouslyHappySister a kangaroo costume when she played Kanga in a grade school play, and I'll admit, that costume was way better. Way way better. But thank goodness nobody will be standing next to me wearing that costume this weekend. Because it would be embarassing.


Now, maybe you're asking yourself, "what made him decide to be a kangaroo?" This is a valid question. So I was sitting in stats class, after just turned in my project, and I was already bored. I hate that class so so much.

So my mind may have wandered a little. And suddenly, it came to me. "KANGAROOOOOOO!" Excitedly, I whispered it to myself. "Baller! Kangaroo time!" Thank goodness the girl sitting next to me already knew how weird I am.

I could barely contain myself all football practice. I think I asked every player what they were going to be, just so they would ask me. For example:

"Hey, so what are you dressing up as for Halloween?"

"A tampon." (seriously)

"Fun!"

"What are you going to be?"

"I'm a kangaroo!! Hippity hop hop!!!"

That was my cue to excitedly dance away, searching for my next victim.


And I'm not the only one getting excited. Some people are already getting dressed up. On my way home from practice, I saw one of my favorite homeless people (Lenny) wearing a pink jumpsuit on which he had sharpied in the words "Duh. I'm a Care Bear." I love that man.

This Is The Story Of The Boys Who Loved You, Love You Now And Loved You Then...

The Decemberists - Red Right Ankle


So I get a text today at around noon, a text from my friend informing me that a mutual friend of ours has been killed in a car crash.

Naturally, I'm distressed, and I text her back, asking for details. I get no reply. So I spend all day being totally miserable. I yelled at my roommate for daring to question me when I told him that in the movie Lisence to Kill, James Bond was played by Timothy Dalton. He tried to tell me it was Roger Moore (and just for the record, I was right). But I freaked out on him. I'm fairly certain I threw a sleeve of crackers at him.

So the day goes on, and I do my best to study, and I'm failing miserably, as I can't focus on anything. But I'm determined to not whine about my feelings to anyone, so I'm keeping it in, minus the occasional violent outburst.

Then, about 45 minutes ago, aka 12 hours after I replied to my friend asking for more information, she responds. In this text she informs me that our friend has surgeries up the butt and will be out of commission for a long time. Now, I am confused, because as far as I know, they do not perform surgery on dead people, and they're generally out of commission permanantly.

So I call her up, wondering what the dealio is:

"Oh," she says, "no she's not dead. She was in a terrible car accident, but she's fine. I might have said she's like dead."

"LYING WHORE!!! YOU TOLD ME MY FRIEND WAS DEAD!"

"Like dead."

"DAMN YOU!!"

So apparently, my friend was in a horrendous car accident and basically the lower half of her body is shattered, but the doctors say she's going to be fine.

As for Ms. EvilTexterFriend, the jury is still out. She may or may not have various oddly rectangular bruises all over her body soon (screw pistolwhipping. the cellwhip is the newest craze).

Let The Rain Fall, I Don't Care, I'm Your's, And Suddenly You're Mine...

Aqualung - Brighter Than Sunshine

This might be the greatest thing I've ever seen.

So these 7th graders and their teacher rap a remake of T.I.'s song "Whatever You Like," except it's "You Can Vote However You Like," and seeing these kids dance and rap is the greatest thing ever.

In this version, they performed on CNN, and their dancing is way better, but in this one, their teacher, the whitest man in history, gets into the act, and it's epic (and not in a Steven Tyler and Run DMC sort of way, but in a "wow, this guy is really white, and I love it" sort of way). Enjoy.


Oh and here's the new lyrics:

Obama on the left
McCain on the right
We can talk politics all night
And you can vote however you like
You can vote however you like, yeah

Democratic left
Republican right
November 4th we decide
And you can vote however you like
You can vote however you like, yeah

(McCain supporters)
McCain is the man
Fought for us in Vietnam
You know if anyone can
Help our country he can
Taxes sharpen up (I think? I couldn't find the lyrics to this verse online)
Don't you know, Oil's gonna flow,
Drillin' low, I'll show, our economy will grow.

I want Obama
FORGET OBAMA,
Stick wit McCain you gone have some drama
MORE WAR IN IRAQ
Iran he will attack
CAN’T BRING OUR TROOPS BACK
We gotta vote Barack!

Obama on the left
McCain on the right
We can talk politics all night
And you can vote however you like, I said
You can vote however you like, yeah

Democratic left
Republican right
November 4th we decide
And you can vote however you like, I said
You can vote however you like, yeah

(McCain supporters)
McCain’s the best candidate
With Palin as his running mate
They’ll fight for gun rights, pro life,
The conservative right
Our future is bright
Better economy in site
And all the world will feel our military might

(Obama supporters)
But McCain and Bush are real close right
They vote alike and keep it tight
Obama’s new, he’s younger too
The Middle Class he will help you
He’ll bring a change, he’s got the brains
McCain and Bush are just the same
You are to blame, Iraq’s a shame
Four more years would be insane

Lower your Taxes - you know Obama Won’t
PROTECT THE LOWER CLASS - You know McCain won’t!
Have enough experience - you know that they don’t
STOP GLOBAL WARMING - you know that you won’t

I want Obama
FORGET OBAMA
Stick with McCain
and you’re going to have some drama
We need it
HE’LL BRING IT
He’ll be it
YOU’LL SEE IT
We’ll do it
GET TO IT
Let’s move it
DO IT!

Obama on the left
McCain on the right
We can talk politics all night
And you can vote however you like
You can vote however you like, yeah

Democratic left
Republican right
November 4th we decide
And you can vote however you like, I said
You can vote however you like, yeah

(McCain supporters)
I’m talking big pipe lines, and low gas prices
Below $2.00 that would be nice

(Obama supporters)
But to do it right we gotta start today
Finding renewable ways that are here to stay

I want Obama
FORGET OBAMA,
Stick wit McCain you gone have some drama
MORE WAR IN IRAQ
Iran he will attack
CAN’T BRING OUR TROOPS BACK
We gotta vote Barack!

Obama on the left
McCain on the right
We can talk politics all night
And you can vote however you like, I said
You can vote however you like, yeah

Democratic left
Republican right
November 4th we decide
And you can vote however you like, I said
You can vote however you like, yeah

When I say John,
You say McCain!
John! McCain!
John! McCain!

When I Say Barack.
You say Obama!
Barack! Obama!
Barack! Obama!

"That's How I Feel About You. Right That's How I Feel About You." She Said, "Thanks, I Like You Too." He Said, "Cool."

Kate Nash - Birds


First, this is the cutest song ever. Me gusta.


Second, now I'd like to talk about how Mike Hart knows me, and how he remembered who I am and my name from when I met him a month ago, but I won't. I don't want to brag too much.

I'd like to talk about how the Lions decided to break my heart yet again today. I want to cry. But I'll try not to (I'll try not to talk about it, that is. I'm already crying).


Instead, I think I'll tell you all about the revelation I had last night at a party. Well I didn't really have it. Someone else had it, and I merely got her excess revelation that I picked up off the metaphorical floor. Yeah.

So I go to some shitty house party with a few of my friends (which I was iffy about, because I was still in my 8-hour post-loss moping period, but I went anyway), and upon arriving, I started my house party ritual. I went over to the IPod that was hooked up to the speakers and changed it to the Backstreet Boys (because nothing is better than harmonizing to boy bands along with a house full of drunk people: "You are, you are, you are, you are...doo doo doo doo...DON'T WANNA HEAR YOU SAAAAAAAAIN'T NOTHING but a heartache...")

I then went into their freezer on a quest for popsicles (success!), and then looked around the room for people that I didn't know, and proceeded to join them.

It was here that the revelation took place. So I'm sitting there eating my popsicle (lime), and one of the girls I had just met says to me, "drunk people always find popsicles!" Now, ignoring the fact that I was sober, she's totally right.

At parties, there's always that one kid with a popsicle. And everybody has seen him ("Hey where'd that kid with the popsicle go?" "Oh I saw him go upstairs a few minutes ago." "I saw him stumble into the backyard with a fifth of Burnett's a minute ago. In fact, I think that's him dancing with the maple tree...").

Watch for it next time you're at a party. It's totally true.

I Said To Myself, "Listen, You've Got This Whole Thing Wrong, It All Will Be Forgiven..."

Jason Tripp - Listen


Do you ever have that experience where you do something that makes someone so happy that you almost feel selfish? Like you did something good just to get that magical feeling of making someone happy?

Well that is how I felt tonight after giving a stranger a ticket for the U of M vs MSU football game tomorrow. I swear to you, this kid thanked me 18 times tonight.

So several hours ago, I came to the realization that I had an extra ticket in my possession, so I just took it with me to a party, and I figured someone there would need it.

This was much harder than I ever imagined.

I asked 15 or 16 different people if they needed a ticket, and they all said no. But then that final person that I asked said he needed it, and asked how much I wanted for it. So I handed it to him. And he again asked how much I wanted. I tried to explain that he didn't need to pay me for it. He seemed confused, but he rolled with it.

A few minutes later, one of my friends comes up to me after overhearing him discussing with his friends whether he should return the ticket, as I was obviously incredibly drunk and would regret the decision in the morning.

Needless to say, he kept it.

Now, let me explain. I am given several tickets per home game to give to friends and family. So I gave away all my tickets, but then tonight one of my friends called me to say that she could no longer go to the game, so she returned the ticket. So it's not like I paid for this ticket, so I clearly clearly can't sell it to someone, right?

I don't know, but that kid was so happy, it was totally worth it. He seemed like a baller.

Tell Me Facts, Tell Me Facts, Tell Me Facts, Tell Me Facts, Throw Your Arms Around Me...

Bloc Party - This Modern Love


Aaaah I totally forgot to talk about the greatest moment of the day.

So I was doing my usual Friday morning activities (drinking a gallon of milk, eating blueberry crisp Clif Bars, and reading a book in the grass while I wait until I have to leave for practice), and what did I find in the grass? A 1911-D penny. No big deal. About the most exciting moment ever. Whatevs.

I Almost Forgot To Say Something Else, And If I Can't Fit It In I'll Keep It All To Myself...

Bowling for Soup - Almost (I find this song to be oddly adorable, considering that it's pop-punk. And the thing the lead singer does with the guitar pick at the end of the video is impressive. Don't deny it)


So I may have had a total mental break-down last night, but I can't talk about it here, because I'd sound like a whiny emo nancy, so I won't. No worries.


So first, I was sent this picture, and it makes me giggle an incredible amount.




Second. I think I've given up on warning the world about potential dangers. Clearly nobody listens. Just look at this! Australia is up to it's usual shenanigans!!

Now, mind you, I did not have the patience to read this whole article. I'm far too busy for such things. But from what I can tell, Australian cricket is selling out, in an effort to "[sell] their brand to TV audiences." Bastards!

I can only assume that the rest of the article includes how the rest of the league is employing practices to increase fatalities and make the game even more exciting.

And If There's Any Love In Me Don't Let It Show, Oh And If There's Any Love In Me, Don't Let It Grow...

Noah And The Whale - Shape Of My Heart I kind of love this song, and the video makes me giggle a lot. And apparently there's two videos. So here's number two. If you have 6 minutes and 17 seconds (and I feel as if you do), you should watch both of them.


First, good news. I just owned my Upper Extremities exam. I dominated it. I made it my little exam bitch. No big deal.


So anyhoo, I can only assume that you guys are all terribly excited about tonight, and all know where you're going to be at midnight: the movie theater. HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3!!!!!! Dear God I'm so excited. I could just cry.

So She Named The Baby Elvis, To Make Up For The Royalty He Lacked...

Regina Spektor - Braille (Prettiest song ever written and one of my favorites)


Okay. So I don't know if anyone out there in the world of people that read my blog are religious at all, or are into any sort of sending good vibes or anything, but we just found out that TallRoommate's girlfriend has cancer, so if you have any pleasant thoughts to send her way, that would be magical. Gracias.

Well You're The Closest Thing I Have To Bring Up In A Conversation About A Love That Didn't Last.

Landon Pigg - Can't Let Go


I don't know if you guys watch my new favorite show, "Time Warp," but you should. It's on Wednesday at 8:00 on Discovery (or to make it even better, DISCOVERY HD!!! More highly defined!). They just do random things and then show it in super super slow motion, and it looks baller.

It sounds stupid, and I suppose it is, but I like it. A lot. Much in the same way that I'm addicted to re-runs of "Match Game." Gene Rayburn is just a baller. God I'm immature.

And I Dreamed Your Dream For You, And Now Your Dream Is Real. How Can You Look At Me As If I Was Just Another One Of Your Deals...

Romeo & Juliet - Dire Straits (but The Killers do a non-terrible cover)


Damn you Sports Illustrated.

There Ain't No Reason Things Are This Way, It's How They've Always Been, And They Intend To Stay...

Ain't No Reason - Brett Dennon


So tonight was a night filled with awkward revelations.


So I go to pick my amiga, GirlIWasOnceMadlyInLoveWith, or GIWOMILW, or GWOMIL, or LB, if I may, at the airport. So I borrow my friend's car, and I hit up the airport, and it was magical.

So I pull up in the pick-up zone, and I get out of the car. It's at this point that I hear someone say, "Baby!Bro?" Well I suppose she didn't say Baby!Bro, but you get the point. Anyhoo. So I look over, and I don't recognize this girl at all. Oh shit. Why does this always happen?

So she says to me "do you know me?" "Um...yes?" "Libby?" "OH RIGHT!!!"

It's this girl who lives with one of my friends. I've met her several times. I'm so so bad with names.

Anyhoo, I say to her, "so who's coming to get you?" "Well I'm waiting for the shuttle." "Well no you're not. Get in the car." "Oh thank God."

She then points to some boy standing behind her, "hey this kid is waiting for the shuttle too..." "Well then he's getting in the car too." So stranger boy hops in.

So we're all chatting it up in the car, listening to my bomb Airport mix, hoping this kid isn't going to kill and eat us, and we start to approach campus. So I ask stranger boy where he lives, and after he tells me his apartment complex, I say "Oh! My friends Andromeda and Omega (most bomb pretend names ever? yes) live there!" "Hey, I live right across from them!" "NO WAY!" It's at this point that I realize that stranger boy and I met very briefly several weeks ago. God damn! But thank goodness neither of us remembered.


So basically, the conclusion that I've come to is that I need to come up with some system to better remember names. Because I'm super super bad at it.

And If They Bring Up Your Name, Well They'll Say You Won The War...

Better Than Ezra - Desperately Wanting


Is it so weird to have a dream (nay, a nightmare) where you're really cold and you can't your blanket? I tried telling my roommate, and he said that wasn't scary at all, though it was very odd. Personally, I find it to be terrifying, yet very normal. Who knows?

I'll Just Figure Everything Is Cool, Until I Hear It From You...

Til I Hear It From You - Gin Blossoms


I'm sorry, I love the Gin Blossoms, and this song just reminds me of Empire Records, which is epic, and this is just honestly a good song. I love the harmonies. That's all.


Anyhoo. So I was at the library tonight, and I got super bored, because I'd been there for hours and hours, and my exam isn't until Thursday. So then this girl who is way way too cute for me texted me, so we went and chillaxed, and it was magical.

And in case you're saying to yourself, "yes, get some!" No. Again, as previously mentioned, way way too cute for me. Way too cute for me. But it was still a magical good time.

As I left her apartment, I starting thinking about something I had thought about earlier in the day, and I decided that I was right. I'm destined to die single and alone. True story. I'll be surrounded by women, yes, but I'll be their guy friend. Damn them.

So since I'm going to be alone, in an effort to avoid becoming a crazy cat man (or...), I've decided I'm going to become a foster parent. It'll be amazing. I'm excited.

Surrounded By Strangers I Thought Were My Friends, I Found Myself Further And Further From My Home...

Bob Seber - Against the Wind


It's time for a little thing I like to call "Most Awkward Moment of My Life!!"

This occurred when I was walking through the middle of campus earlier today with my amigo. We passed a building who's windows were painted with several signs of the Zodiac. Now my friend was upset about the fact that Aquarius was not featured, and he says to me, "are you up there?"

That's how I came to find myself yelling the phrase "Yes! They have Cancer! Bam! Suck on that!" This seemed to shock the group of elderly women standing nearby. Shit.

Now, my friend could have helped me a little. He could have loudly said something like, "yes, while they do not feature Aquarius, the water carrier, they do show Cancer, the crab! Boy I love the Zodiac!"

He did not do this.

Instead, he saw this as a chance to further humiliate me: "I'm ashamed of you! Whether or not you like your grandmother, you shouldn't celebrate the fact that her test results came back positive! You disappoint me..."

Damn him.

And I Am Coming Home To You, If It's The Last Thing That I Do...

The Mountain Goats - Sax Rohmer #1


First, this song makes me happy. Listen away.


Second, it's time for a segment I like to call "MENACE TO SOCIETY!!" I've already warned you about Australia and you didn't listen. Perhaps now you will.

So what's today's menace you ask? I'll tell you. Batman.

Now I'm not one of those people who claims that Heath Ledger died because he got to into his part of the Joker. That's ridiculous. But clearly, Batman is a menace.

Why? Well for one reason, he makes innocent party-goers get arrested. That's right. Because to some tiny, out of date law used to stop the KKK from wearing their masks in public, this poor man was arrested for dressing up like the evil caped crusader.

Also, he inspires violence. Just look at this story. Two people dressed like Batman and Robin beat the shit out of someone at a resort. And their third costumed villain, dressed as the Joker, was cleared of all charges. Thats right. While the Batmobile may not have lost a wheel, the Joker got away. (hey!)

Thirdly, everyone incolved with him dies. Just ask Neal Hefti. Oh wait, you can't. He's dead! Who is Neal Hefti you may ask? Oh just the recently deceased writer of the Batman theme. Now nothing I have read indicates the cause of death. My guess? Batman's demonness infected him.


Good people! Read and beware! Batman may be coming for you!!!

I Won't Lie To You, Don't Lie To Me...

Headlights - Get Your Head Around It


How baller would it be to be able to hibernate? But to be able to just turn it on and off, so you could just take 3 day long naps if you want, or they could last months.

For example, don't you ever just have a bad feeling about a week, where you say to yourself, "I'm pretty sure terrible things will happen this week, like I'll run over a mongoose in my car." I know I do.

So why chance it? Just hibernate! It's a perfect system, and I'm pretty sure it'll catch on.

So when we evolve to be able to sleep for however long as we'd like, let everyone know that I called it.

Andrew Won't You Come To My Door...

Hayley - Andrew


Well shit. That game sucked.

And also, I failed socially. So Friday night, my plan was to meet up with a few of my friends who go to Penn State, and go out and socialize, impregnate strangers, shoot heroin, etc. However, I totally fell asleep at 10:45 and woke up with 5 missed calls, each from someone who attends Penn State. Damnation.

But that's okay. Because it was all soon forgotten after the travesty that was the football game.


So on the plane ride home, I did not feel like reading, so I had no choice but to think about nothing, as that's really all that fills my mind. That's how I came to have this thought.

Mountain Dew is the worst name for a pop ever. At least for that specific pop. I feel as if neither lemons nor limes grow on mountains, let alone the mystical lemon-lime. Thus, stupid name. That is all.

Beyond the Palace, Hemi-Powered Drones Scream Down the Boulevard...

Bruce Springsteen - Born to Run


There are few pleasures in life greater than being upstairs and being able to hear your roommate watching American History X for the first time.


GR: aaaaaaaaaOHHHHHH! NO!

Me upstairs: giggle

GR: TEETH DON'T DO THAT!!

Me: Ah yes, the curb stomping scene. Classic.


Anyhoo, I fly out to Pennsylvania this afternoon for the football game, so that'll be magical. I sure hope the plane doesn't crash...

I Know You're Tired Of Not Fitting In, But It's Not Fitting In That Will Help To Begin To Show You Your Beauty...

Ingrid Michaelson - Charlie



So today might have gotten off to the worst start ever. I was supposed to meet with one of my professors at 9:00 this morning to go over various special tests for the thoracic and lumbar spine.

Let me give you a little idea of how well our meeting went. Well at 9:15, I had yet to meet up with her, and I was trapped in a stairwell. "You idiot," you may say, "how did you get stuck in a stairway?"

Well you see, I went through the door that said "exit to stairway only." They weren't lying. There was nowhere else to go. I walked through the door, and it locked behind me. Similarly, all the doors to the other floors were locked. I was trapped. It was evil. I suppose I could have gone out the emergency exit which had a large alarm on the right corner and said "DO NOT EXIT. ALARM WILL SOUND." But I opted against it.

I ended up having to have GayRoommate come free me from my stairway purgatory. After getting lost in this terrible building several more times, I ended up meeting her at 9:45. I explained the situation to her, and she laughed for a full minute. Damn her.


However, in happier news, ObnoxiouslyHappySister has made the best blog ever. It features me! And my hijinks! I love it.

The King Was In The Garden, Picking Flowers For A Friend Who Came To Play...

The Beatles - Cry Baby Cry


Time for a segment I like to call "GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE." Odds are it'll only happen once. Because, I mean, the greatest moment of your life probably only happens once.

So prior to today, the most loving thing FavoriteSister has ever said to me is that I'm "not too grimy." Now, I love this girl more than life, and I know she loves me too. She just doesn't show it with words.

But today that all changed. Today. Today when she said to me, via Facebook, that she's...wait for it..."moderately fond of me." YES!!! That basically="I LOVE YOU!!" No big deal.

I read this when I was at the library. I was on one of my Facebook creeping breaks I get for working for two hours. I was so excited, I had to tell the girl sitting next to me. I did not know this girl. It was awkward. Or...this. The most awkward turtle.

And If I Start A Commotion, I'll Only End Up Losing You, and That's Worse...

Buzzcocks - Ever Fallen In Love (you have to click the play button near the top right corner of the screen)


Now today was filled with epicness (a real word). I'd like to tell you about all of it.

I'd like to tell you about the fact that I got 5 gallons of milk for the price of one, because they expire tomorrow, and the store manager is a baller. And yes, they will be gone by tomorrow night. I swear it.

I'd love to tell you about the entire sorority that now wants my body after I played the piano for them.

But instead, I'll be leaving out the details of those stories, because I feel as if it's my duty to inform you when I learn something that is of great importance. Information that is no doubt as key to your life as it is to mine. Information...that could save the world.

Today, thanks to Cosmo, I learned that if a man asks his girlfriend to have a threesome with her and her friend, and the girlfriend says no, their relationship is over. OVER. Instead, the girlfriend needs to say, "some girls are into that, but I'm not." That way, the relationship is still going strong.

See the difference? "No," compared to...well..."no." Shit. Well nevertheless. That's relationship saving news. From Cosmo, to me, to you. You're welcome.

I Want to Know About You As Quick as I Can...

Coco B's - Modern Lover


So someone tried to convince me today that "Kiss Me" by Sixpence None the Richer is the greatest song ever written. Now, don't get me wrong. I love that song. I recently had a magical moment involving that song with one of the head athletic trainers I work with on the way back from an away game.

It was 1 in the morning and we were still on the road, and that song came on the radio. It was much like that scene in Tommy Boy. First, we both acted like we were to badass to like it, but we'd keep it just because we were too lazy to change the station. Then slowly we both started singing quietly, until we were both belting it at the top of our lungs. It was glorious.

But that moment is not enough to make me say that it's the greatest song ever written.

As everybody knows (or should know at least), the title of best song ever written rests securely with Freddie Mercury, for the song "Spread Your Wings." Disagree? Well you're wrong. Sorry.

And Like the Moon Doesn't Care if the Sun Doesn't Shine, the Sea Doesn't Care if You're Lonesome Tonight...

Eric Bachmann - Man o' War

First, listen to this song. Please. It's for your own good. I don't know how I only just now discovered it, but I've been spending every spare moment I have listening to it.


Now, it's time for a recurring segment I like to call "Self-Revelations!!"

I want to be in a musical. A major Broadway musical. And stop that, yes I realize I can't sing. I do not care. I want to stand up on the stage on belt out pure orgasmic beauty.

Everyone in the audience will ignore the fact that I cannot sing, because they will see that I'm trying hard, and they'll be too caught up in the story anyways, due to my mad acting skills. I don't think I need to remind anyone of my past theatrical triumphs (for example, my Freshman year of high school when a few of my friends and I made an epic re-make of Alive, featuring many state of the art special effects such as dramatically eating beef jerky peeled off the body of a prone friend, a la cannibalism. Needless to say, we got an A).

So if anyone knows of any openings on Broadway, give me a holla. I have my resume, head shots, and pseudonym ready. From now on, call me Buster McReallygoodlooking.

She Broke Your Throne and She Cut Your Hair...

Ari Hest - Hallelujah (cover)


I just encouraged someone to drink mustard. There's something wrong with me. But it was real cool. Apparently the body doesn't like that much mustard, because there was a lot of coughing.

And It's Not Like We're Never Gonna Fall, Just Not This Week...

Sungod Abscondo - Drunk On Me

First off, I think it's time for a DBG update. Per the usual, no closer than ever. Shitsticks.

Anyhoo, as I sit here in the library, yet again pouring over journal after journal about avulsion fractures of the anterior superior iliac spine (a topic that used to be so interesting...), I find myself wondering "why?" Well to be specific, my exact thought is "Dear God, why?!?"

And it was while I was in this self-pitying whiny whiny state that I came to a realization. Off-white is a terrible terrible color. This, of course, includes such variants as cream, eggshell, seashell, ivory, and naturally, Navajo white. They all suck.

Is there anything more depressing than sitting at a desk that is so plain, it can't even be white? It's as if the desk makers said to themselves, "let's make a brown desk. No wait, let's make it white. Or...gray? No. Let's make it almost white. That way, people will look at it, and be sad."

So now, as I'm sitting in a room filled with every possible shade of off-white taking various forms (ceiling, desk, floor, walls, oddly pale girl across from me, etc.), I feel the need to come up with some way to get excited.

Should I just get up and dance? No. Too cliched.

Perhaps..."answer" my phone and have a conversation with Johnny Depp? No, because what if he actually called while I was doing it. Boy would that be awkward and hard to disguise.

Clearly I'm failing at this. The thoughts rush through my head: impromtu Civil War re-enactment? A hoedown? Setting off the fire alarms? No! None of these will do!

Finally, I realize, it's time to bring out the big guns. It's time to gather up the people around me and have a Captain Planet huddle break!


Let our powers combine!
Earth!
Fire!
Wind!
Water!
Heart!
(together) Go Planet!


Yeah. That should do it.

And Though I Ask For Help In Riddles, it is Clearer in my Mind, Clearer in my Mind...

Regina Spektor - Aquarius


I've decided that whoever writes headlines for various major news services needs to be fired. Because sometimes I'm trying to catch up on my world news, and I come across an article titled "Texts from elephant warn rangers of trouble."

Now, this headline makes me imagine an elephant patrolling a small town. Suddenly, he sees a ninja in the forest! He quickly pulls out his handy cell phone and somehow uses his giant feet, or perhaps his trunk, to text the autorites, causing them to come rushing up in their Hummer to run that evil ninja over.

And other times, this mystery writer is apparently produced with such a lame story that one would think that he/she would try and spice it up a little with a baller headline, but instead he/she comes up with something like "Dangerous Fruit." Really?

And "European Leaders Agree to Inject Cash Into Banks?" With what, a syringe? In all honesty, I don't really think that's funny. I just think the picture is hilarious. Mr. Awkward McGee I Hold My Arms Out And I Don't Look At The Camera just makes me giggle.

Take A Peek Into the Way I Seek...

Atmosphere - Bleed Slow


So this is what I've decided. People are awesome. Let me tell you how I came to this conclusion.

It was a long time ago (18 minutes I think). I was dancing in the middle of the street outside my apartment (to Aqua. Don't judge me). A car was coming (which was odd, because it's a Saturday night and nobody is driving), but in the other lane, so I was free to continue to dance. However, I noticed this car slowing down as it reached me.

By the time the car was next to me, it had come to a complete stop. The driver then got out, and joined me. So she and I were dancing for about 30 seconds when two pedestrians made the trip from the sidewalk to the street, and joined us. One more person came a moment later, and the song ended with 5 of us having a bad 90's music dance party in the middle of the street. It was glorious.

So glorious, in fact, that I decided to postpone my trip to a shitty house party to blog about it. But now I'm off.

But again. Conclusion of the day, people are ballers.

And You Think You Found the Bag, You're Getting Weaker and Your Knees Begin to Sag...

Van Morrison - Madame George. (it's a longish song, but if you don't know it, you should listen to all of it, because it's by far my fav Van Morrison song. Then, if you like it, you should listen to the full 10 minute version. This clip is live, but it's more like the way he released it on Astral Weeks. It's acoustic, and I like it.)


Okay I have two main things to discuss here. First. How do we feel about stocking up on a certain item, in the fear the when you need it, you'll be all out, and it will not be available. For example, Luden's cough drops. A little over a week ago when I needed some, I went to the drug store, and they had a whole wall of cough drops, but the only Luden's they had were honey lemon. GIGAWHAT?!? NO!!!!!

Now, some people would branch out, and try other perhaps accepting that maybe they didn't know for a fact what the best brand was. These people are idiots. Or at least, they're not me (thus, idiots). Because I know what the best brand is. It's Luden's, and the best flavors are wild cherry and berry assortment.

So when I stopped in to this same drug store yesterday, and they had restocked, I bought 8 bags of Luden's, 4 berry assortment, and 4 wild cherry. Because I know that the other brands blow, and I will not be subjected to using them the next time I need a cough drop, and that's that.


Point number two. The people at ChapStick are assholes. They get you addicted, and you have no choice but to continue to use it. And they must have scientists and engineers working to make a stick of it as losable as possible. Because I must have so many of them scattered about my apartment, and my classes, and at practice. If I were to guess, I'd say I've invested roughly 18.4 trillion dollars in Cherry ChapStick alone. It's a curse.

I Was Kidnapped Real Young by the Sweet Taste of Love, Built a Fondness for Things that Just Weren't Good Enough...

Tilly and the Wall - Rainbows In the Dark

Okay, first off, you should watch this video. Because Tilly and the Wall is the coolest band ever. They don't have a drummer, just someone tap dancing. Tell me that's not baller.

Anyhoo. If you're Jewish and you've wronged me in the past year, well it's too late to apologize (just for you Timby) to me. Granted, I got a few texts and calls, but NOT ENOUGH. I know there was more wronging done by at least one suitemate from last year. Yes, my old roommate called me, but did the suitemate?!? NO!! Damn him. I wouldn't have forgiven him for anything anyways. Jerkface.

Point number two. I think I love scarves. I already knew this, but I love them more than ever. I don't know what's made my love increase so drastically, but something has. So if anyone feels like making me one (hint hint...ObnoxiouslyHappySister or FavoriteSister) I'd be totally okay with it. Makes a great Christmas present! I mean, in case you're getting started early.

And point number three. The next time I'm walking down the street drinking straight from my gallon of chocolate milk, and a stranger comes up to me and says, "excuse me, but do you know what's in that?" I'm going to hurt them.

Tomorrow's Just An Excuse Away, So I Pull My Collar Up and Face the Cold, On My Own. The Earth Laughs Beneath My Heavy Feet...

Smashing Pumpkins - Thirty-Three


So I've decided to give up on studying. It's clearly useless anyway. Perhaps at one point it was useful, though I personally cannot vouch for it. Much like the appendix. So screw it.

Anyhoo, happier news. Check out my baller picture dealio on the left. NO BIG DEAL. I guess it switches through the pictures I uploaded to Flickr, so it's a new arrangement every time the page loads. Technology these days.

Oh, and so I have the most baller new armband ever. Nobody else seems to approve of it, but I'm pretty sure it's hilarious. Let me describe it. It's taken from the bottom end of a white Trace forearm pad. I just cut off about an inch of it, and wrote "HOWDY!" on it, and now its resting just above my elbow. How great is that?!? Again, nobody else likes it, but I still think it's funny, so I'm keeping it.

And one last point. Now, as you may or may not know about me. I have every intention of voting for Obama this November, though deep down I'm still a Hillary supporter. So I'm not like many Obama supporters who view him as the Savior, but I like him, and I think he'll be a good President. But after seeing this picture, I may have changed my mind. Barak Obama may indeed be Jesus. Honestly.

Speak In Terms of Belief and Belonging, Try to Fit Some Name to Their Longing...

Jackson Browne - In the Shape of a Heart (Acoustic Version)


First off, I don't know who in Berlin is reading my blog, but whoever you are, I love you. Like Noah loves Allie. Except in not as sexy and romantic a way. So really, I love you like Elwood loves Jake.

Moving on.

So I have a Stats exam in a few hours. I've been studying far far too much. To make me feel like I was getting sleep, and not pulling an all-nighter, I chose the classic going to bed incredibly late and waking up at 6 this morning. That's a victory for mankind. Parents, if you're reading, no worries. I'll catch up on sleep this weekend. Or perhaps when I'm dead. But probably this weekend.

But the problem with this exam is that, of course, it has nothing to do with Stats. I don't know about you, but when I hear "Stats class" I think math. Mine of course is about...um...okay I have no idea what it's about. After half of a semester and several days of studying, I still have no idea what it's about. But I'm sure it'll be fine.

Oh. Wait.

So last night, I'm walking (read: riding my Razor scooter, because I'm a lame-o) to the the library, and I hear "Oh my god! I love your scooter! And your ponytail!" So I turn to see an incredibly attractive girl in the passenger seat of a car, driven by another attractive girl, with two more of them in the backseat. But of course, as they were driving down the street, they proceeded to continue to do so, and they were gone, leaving me wondering whether it would have ever worked between us.

A few hours later...I'm walking (again, scootering...scooting?) back home, and I hear, "Holy shit! Ponytail!" I turn to see, yet again, the same car, except without the two girls in the back. But again, much to my despair, they continued to drive/break my little heart. Damn them.

Good thing I still have my love life planned out.

In the City the Lion Sleeps, Pray to Sony My Soul to Keep...

Semisonic - Singing In My Sleep

First off. Just a bit of...I don't want to say bragging...but...well yes, bragging. I warned you all about Australia. And now look what's happened. There! Australia's most famous meet pie van has now been in operation for 70 years! Next up, their government is going to buy Canada. And once they have a solid base in Quebec, they basically own the world. Soon, it won't even be called the world, rather everything will be refered to as the Outback. Is that the kind of world...er...outback that you want your children to grow up in?!? I think not!

But no more. I warned you, and you chose not to listen. I wash my hands of you.

Now, on to bigger and better things. It's time for self-realization time. I've realized I have a terrible problem with authority. Not in an angsty 15 year-old I hate my parents sort of problem with authority, mind you, but a far more problematic one really.

Let me explain. I have no problem when people that I view as my superiors, or authority figures, if I may, give me some sort of direction, or order. My problem comes when people that I view as equals try to give me orders. That makes me want to drop kick them off of a roof.

And it's not so much that they're giving me an order. Again, I don't have an issue with that. It's because despite the fact that they're clearly an equal of mine, it makes me feel like they think they're above me, and I hate that more than anything. Thus, the drop kicking.

I'm sorry for the rant. It's just that I spent a large portion of today walking away from one of my peers specifically, muttering angrily under my breath various unintelligible obsenities mixed with a few phrases one might be able to pick out as English, including: "don't you ever tell me what to do," "what makes you think you're in charge of me," "you don't know me" (pronounced, yawo KNOW me), and of course the classic "if you come near me ever again, I'll spit on your leg." Yeah. Name a worse feeling than knowing there's spit all over your leg. Eww.

So They Made My Life Into A Movie, As If I Could Forget Those Years...

Jack's Mannequin - Annie Use Your Telescope



Now when I see a growing menace, I feel as if it is my duty to alert the rest of the world to it. "World!" I yell, "A menace is growing!" Most people choose to ignore me, thinking I'm simply a confused homeless person. I can only hope that you people (yeah, I said it) can see that in this instance, you better listen, lest you face the terrible future that will be if this problem is not dealt with.

This problem, of course, is Australia. And if we don't stomp them out, soon, they'll rule the world! Read on.

Now no doubt you have heard of the young lad who recently went on a bit of a rampage, feeding 13 animals, including, yes, a "large turtle" to a crocodile at an Austrailian zoo. But this little bit of creative tom-foolery is not the only sign that Austrailia is on the rise.

The Australians apparently also live longer. This cheery old lass recently turned 108, and apparently is still quite the partier, reportedly enjoying a morning tea two days in a row to celebrate her big day. Woah. Slow down there lady. Though, admittedly, it did seem to wear her out a little. Quite understandable I dare say!

Also, they have far more exciting office parties, at least judging by this government official who resigned after the story broke that he danced semi-nude at a parliamentary office party. Can you imagine, say, Hillary Clinton dancing in just her bra and panti...oh God. I just did. Scratch that. Moving on.

They have also developed a far more exciting method of reducing greenhouse gases. It's so obvious! Eat the kangaroos! Now why can't some courageous young American environmentalist just step up and admit that the real way to lower this country's emmissions is to eat baby deer? Everybody knows it! SOMEONE ANSWER THE CALL!!

Now apparently, all this positive news coming out of Australia has gotten people excited to travel there. This young lad just couldn't wait to touch down!

Something must be done.

I Said, "My Shit's Fucked Up? Well I Don't See How..." He Said, "Well the Shit That Used to Work, Well it Won't Work Now..."

Warren Zevon - My Shit's Fucked Up


So I think I have pink eye. I mean, I guess I don't know the real symptoms of it. I haven't spoken to any medical personel about it. But I've had a real bad cold, and I woke up this morning and my eye was crusted shut (terribly appealing, no?), and it's all red, and it's been watering all day. So I'm just assuming.

But I'm assuming you don't want to read about my pink eye. So here we go. After much soul searching, it's been decided. I have to go on a quest to meet Regina Spektor. If you know me, you know that I have every intention of marrying her someday, despite the fact that I've never technically "met her." That's of little consequence.

Because let's face it, she's the most gorgeous woman alive. Also, voice of an angel.

So it's going down. I'm going to buy a ring. I'm going to find her. I'm going to propose. And she's going to say yes. I'm excited.

I'll wait for the pink eye to go away first.

I Had an Argument Today, Someone Didn't See My Way...

New Faces - My Alarm

No more! Never again will I want to cry Sunday afternoon! I will no longer talk shit about the rest of the NFC North, simply because I'm jealous of them.

Of course this is all a lie. I will continue to do this every week that the Lions lose. Because every time they lose, I die a little inside. Because this is the problem. It's not like I simply watch the Lions and hope they win. Every week, no matter who they're playing, I honestly believe with all my heart that they're going to win. Before every season, I truly believe that they're going undefeated and winning the Super Bowl. No question about it.

That's what makes a loss like today's (34-7) expecially heartbreaking. Because I can't see why it happened. Because we're SO MUCH BETTER THAN THEM. WE'RE THE BEST TEAM IN THE LEAGUE! WHY ARE WE LOSING?!? TO CHICAGO?!?!? BECAUSE JUDGING FROM THE MLB PLAYOFFS, NO CHICAGO TEAM SHOULD EVEN BE ON THE FIELD, FOR FEAR OF EMBARASSING THE ENTIRE COUNTRY.

I could die.


Anyhoo. I'm done with capitals and italics. For now. On to the point of this post.

So now, don't argue with me here, everybody knows that Johnny Depp's best movie is Ed Wood (so apparently I lied about the italics). Without seeing it, one might be temped to think that Ed didn't really care about his craft, aka Plan 9 From Outer Space. But after seeing Ed Wood, you realize that this man put his life into his movies.

So what are his other movies you may ask? Well because one of my friends is a pretentious movie buff, I have access to essentially every movie I could ever dream of watching, so I've seen several of them (Bride of the Monster, The Night the Banshee Cried, Night of the Ghouls). However, this past Friday, I watched an Ed Wood movie that may now be my second favorite movie of all time, behind only Rocky.

Of course, this movie is Jail Bait. I don't want to tell you much about this movie, so as not to ruin it, except that the tagline is "Danger!...These Girls are Hot!" Epic. Watch it.

You Say We're Both Little People and You Like it That Way...

Never Shout Never- bigcitydreams

First off, I've decided that, as all of my post titles are lyrics from baller songs, I should share them with you, just in case you don't know them every once in a while. So I'll be including the name of the song and artist, and if if you click on it, it should lead you to a website that streams the mp3. Hurray!


Anyhoo. It's been decided. By me. That the floor is simply the best place to sleep. Wait for it. First off, I can't tell you how many times I've fallen asleep on the floor studying (yes, I often study on the floor, ironically so I won't fall asleep).

Second, my roommate's friend was in town last night, so she slept on our incredibly comfy couch. However, she brought one of her friends, so I offered that she could take my bed, and I'd just sleep on the floor. I passed out instantly. Before we even got to the first commercial break of Home Improvement, and I wasn't that tired. I blame the floor.

Third, after I got back from the game tonight, seeing my couch, seeing my floor, where did I decide would be the best place to lay down? The floor of course. It's in my subconscious mind now. I can't help it. Much in the same way that every time someone says the word "malicious" I dance the Charleston. There's no explanation.

You've Got Your Love Online, You Think You're Doing Fine, but You're Just Plugged Into the Wall...

So both TallRoommate and ShortRoommate have their girlfriends (or gf's, if I may) in town. Yeah. True story. This leaves just me and GayRoommate as the single people in the apartment. Speaking of which, why is it that girls who are in relationships think that I'm hot shit, and keep thinking I'm willing to be a homewrecker (unfortunately, I'm not), while single girls think I'm their brother? Damnation!

Anyhoo. That's my whine for the day. Time for the point of this post.

Wait, I was watching the VP debate last night, and there was a commercial proclaiming Clean Coal as the energy of the future. Now I agree with Barack on most all issues, with a few exceptions, and I'm pretty sure this is one of them. I feel as if a non-renewable resource cannot possibly be the "energy of the future." Yes, I can agree that compared to oil, it's a better energy of the present, but I'm pretty sure relying on clean coal as the energy of the future is bad news bears.

Sorry, that wasn't the point of this post either. My bad. I got distracted. Okay...wait for it...here we go.

So today, I was walking through campus with a few people, and I saw this girl who had what is quite possibly the coolest hair in history. First off, hottest haircut ever. I don't know how she got her bangs to cut so sharply across her face, but she did, and it was glorious. That alone would be enough to make her hair stupendous, but to make it even better, it was teal.

So naturally, as we walk past, I slow down for a hot second to say "I love your hair." She looked at me as if I had said to her "I plan to kill your puppy and eat him with Ranch dressing." She was honestly shocked and disgusted with me.

I won't lie to you, I don't blame her. I blame myself. I really must have offended her somehow. How? I don't know, but I did. So if anyone knows how that was offensive, please give me a holla. Thank you.

Loneliness Is Such A Sad Affair, and I Can Hardly Wait to be With You Again...

Let me describe to you a conversation I had with my TallRoommate's girlfriend. I swear to you this is it as far as I can recall.

TRG: "Hey you know a lot about movies right?"

Me: "Yeah I like to think so."

TRG: "Well I saw part of this one movie, and I don't know what it was called."

Me: "Well is it a new movie or an old movie?"

TRG: "Real new, like within the past year or two."

Me: "Okay, well who did it have in it?"

TRG: "I think maybe Al Pacino. Or Sean Penn."

Me: "Ocean's Thirteen? Two For the Money? I think All the King's Men had Sean Penn..."

TRG: "No, I don't think it was any of those..."

Me: "Well what was happening in the movie?"

TRG: "There might have been a semi-truck."

Me: "I see."

TRG: "It might have been Robert DeNiro."

Me: "Wait...are you talking about Heat?"

TRG: "HEAT! YES!"

Me: "Heat? The movie that came out over a decade ago?"

TRG: "It seemed recent."


Yeah.

She Said Don't Let Your Future Be Destoryed By My Past...

So here's the deal. I was talking to my friend about her sister's wedding (as you loyal readers may recall, I wrote the speech that she is delivering). This got me thinking. Wedding cake is real real good.

This led me to my next thought. While all wedding cake is good, not all cake is good.

This hurts me to say, but some cake blows. It blows hard. Take essentially any variety of cheesecake. They all suck. I think, in my entire life, I have enjoyed a single piece of cheesecake, and it was caramel cheesecake.

But look at marble cake, on the other hand, and you get pure orgasmic goodness in your mouth.

All these thoughts about cake led me to a more important thought. There are lots of things in life that are way better than other things in the same category. I'm sorry if that doesn't make any sense. Wait for it...here we go.

Take medical television shows, for example. At the top, we have Scrubs, ER, and House, and at the bottom we have Gray's Anatomy.

Or flavors of Laffy Taffy. Again, at the top are Strawbery, Green Apple, and Grape, and at the bottom is Banana.

But most importantly, and this is where this post is really headed, let's think about life decisions. On the list of personal life decisions I've made in the past few days, at the top are my decision to eat an entire box of Mini Wheats and drink a gallon of milk in the span of an hour a half, to hold a Mika dance party outside with a gathering of 18 or 20 strangers, to toy with my incredibly drunk roommate (aka asking him 13 times in the span of 10 minutes whether he'd done the dishes, without him catching on that he might be repeating himself: "Yeah...but I accidentally put liquid soap in the dishwasher."), and to wear shorts and a t-shirt to practice despite the fact that it was incredibly cold, thus forever sealing my badassery.

And, at the bottom of this list would be the decisions to try to insult one of the head Athletic Trainers with the same insult he dispensed on me except that I stumbled over my words (end result: "No, you're a sasshole!"), to drink the juice left in my can of pears because I already drank my gallon of milk (exact quote: "eew."), and, of course, to take a nap in the grass and take my shoes off (end result: stolen shoes). Granted, these were not my shoes per se. They had been given to me by my friend who never wore them, because he didnt like sandals. No harm done! Hurray!

Grey Skies, and Light Fading, Headlamps Making Patterns on the Wall...

Oh, and I've decided it's time for a DBG update. Still, sadly, incredibly out of reach. Tanty, I feel you.

I Can See but I've Lost My Sight. I'm High, So High, Like Ben Franklin's Kite...

First off, some minor housekeeping.

If you read my previous post, you would know that I wrote an epic poem (move over Bobby Frost) in my sleep. Yes, it even followed a simple rhyme scheme. I can only assume that all my friends and family members are incredibly proud.

All my friends and family members, that is, except for my mother (or mi madre, if I may, for our Spanish-speaking neighbors). I get an email from her today stating that she thought about calling me yesterday at 7:30 and waking me up, but she thought I was surely awake, and she would be acting like a crazy person. She went on to add that apparently she was wrong.

NO MENTION OF THE POEM.

NO "YOU DOMINATED? GOOD JOB!!"

Why can't anyone be proud of me?!? Girl please.


Anyhoo, housekeeping over. In other news, it's been finalized. I'm getting a tattoo. In all honesty, it's been decided for like 6 months. But I think I'm actually going to go out and get it. In a few months.

It's going to be of a smiley face. Not with any yellow or anything, just the black outline and the eyes and mouth. About the size of a half dollar. In some place easily hideable. And it'll be baller. I'm excited. However, I'm having trouble deciding which easily hideable place I want to choose, so if anyone has any suggestions, feel free to let me know. Por favor. Gracias.